ROLLER COASTER
I continue to be amazed by the roller coaster of emotions with grief. Even throughout just one day, I can feel sadness, joy, confusion, and regret. But although this week started off to be hard, there were so many moments of joy that I decided I would focus on those instead. Much to my surprise, there were so many examples in just a few days! Here they are!
Our anniversary would have been last Monday, the 10th. The day started with sadness and regret but had beautiful moments sprinkled throughout the day. Two examples: flowers from both of my kids. As you can see, my dog, Ruby, was partial to one arrangement.
I met my oldest granddaughter for coffee and we threw our heads back in laughter several times. Chloe, the second oldest, and I have been having such a hard time getting together (she’s 16, need I say more?). When I was teasing her about aligning our calendars, she said, “Cheryl Candace Baker, you’re not so easy to get together with yourself!!” I haven’t been called by that string of names for so long, that I laughed and then chuckled the rest of the day. And Jimmy and I are planning a visit to Bass Pro Shops so he can start his Christmas Wish List. I just hope I’ll have enough money!
I got to go to a play with Max and Lily, and they actually sat still for two and a half hours. It was fun to look over and see the laughter and amazement on their faces. I was reminded that kids are still fun even when they aren’t toddlers any more. Maybe even more fun!
We’re starting to plan a Cousin Christmas Sleepover. (I’ll believe it when I see it; three of them are teen-agers, after all.)
It rained off and on for two days! In Southern California. In October. During a record breaking drought.
A delivery man dropped off two heavy bags of dog food to my front porch. When he saw me start to move the box, he said, “Can I help you?” I was touched my his kindness. (But if you read my last post, you know I did it “all by myself.”)
I have learned to make my very own acai bowl where I can jumble up a bunch of fruits and vegetables and start my day off healthy. Tasty with no guilt.
Most importantly, we heard some beautiful stories of connection and gratitude from some of the men and women who have joined the Life’s Healing Choices Grief Groups. Oh, how I love the connection to my own group.
The holidays are coming. Like any of us in a season of grief, I we are going to go through some rough days, but I’m going to try extra hard to focus on joy. I’m in the season of my life when I don’t take happiness for granted. I don’t want to miss these moments of joy throughout the day. I want to hold onto them and cherish them.
I’m going to start praying about ways that I could bring a little bit of sunshine or joy into someone else’s life. Won’t you join me?
How have you received or given joy this week?
Romans 15:13, “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”